Last week when it snowed the smallers were in a complete frenzy the night before. They are full on into the 'get out of school at all costs' mindset. So the mere idea of snow sent them into a whirling dervish of snow preparation activity. I am not talking snow pants and mittens. I am talking worshipping winter gods and creating rituals to those newly formed deities. This is the chant they do while stomping around in a circle and alternating their hands and upper torsos up and down.
"Hooa heya snowa heya, hooa heya snowa heya."
They do this for about five minutes. Then they run and get ice from the freezer and flush it down the toilet. Evidently the quickest way to get their frozen offering to the gods of wintry precipitation is through the shitter.
Then back to the chant.
"Hooa heya, snowa heya, hooa heya snowa heya."
Now comes the one on one worship. They take turns. They kneel toward the window and bow as they pray.
Small: Oh snow gods. We do not want to go to school tomorrow. Please send us at least three inches of snow. That is all I ask. Three inches, oh great snow gods. If three inches is completely impossible, please, oh great snow gods, please send ice so the buses cannot drive. Please, I beg of you great and wonderful snow gods.
Smaller: Oh great and good looking snow gods, please make it snow. Snoooooooooooooow. Snooooooooow. We neeeeeeeeeeeeeeed snoooooooooooow. You are so good looking. Give us snooooooooooow.
Smallest: I want snow.
Smallest is still working on her delivery evidently. Lastly they gather together and put their hands in the center and yell "Go snow!" When all this was finished they high fived each other on a job well done and fell into bed expecting the best. The next morning there was a two hour delay and the three agreed that they had not prayed hard enough and that next time, more ice was needed down the toilet as well.
My little pagans.
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3 comments:
Quite possibly my favorite smaller story. "You are so good looking." Hysterical. You really should write a book. I'd buy it. So there's a solid $12.95 right there.
Your children crack me up!
-mess
I definitely had a snow dance that I did up until.. middle school? It was very faux-native-american... stomping around on one foot, then the other, went something like "HEY-ya hey-ya HEY-ya hey-ya, snow! snow! SNOW SNOW SNOW!"
The most effective thing usually was doing my homework - if I did all the reading and homework school would inevitably be delayed or closed. If not, then of course school was open.
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