a new process called 'let it go'

I was thinking about something Hunka had posted a while ago on his blog. The post is great and I like pretty much everything he says. It in many ways made me think of Grotowski's poor theatre. Grotowski is fairly strict in his principles to attain honesty in performance. I find what he puts forth very interesting and many times helpful. But I railroad into the same issue I have with every acting method I have ever come across. It is just not for everyone. At some point every method for acting runs the same risk, that it ends up being more about process than product and at some point theatre has to have a product (it may still be developing, but it is still a product). Being in the moment and listening are hard for many to do, but clouding impulses with a messy process can be even more debilitating. I believe that many artists reach a moment of clarity at some point where the realize what works best for them. There is no one true process that is better than another. Every writer must have a moment when they realize how to best utter their thoughts, every painter discovers mediums that work best for them, and every actor (hopefully) seeks the key to realized moments on stage.

My moment of clarity came fairly early in my education. I worked for a while with a director who sought to build characters through many of Grotowski's exercises. Finding centers, impulse work and the like. Then I worked with another who shed all of it to go for an approach much more like - well Mamet. Little time was spent on character walks or subtext, instead we were expected to just do it in the moment. Staging, costumes, and tech were all much more important. I found both to have their hindrances, but in the end it was I who was the problem, not the directors. As an actor I loved getting to spend a lot of time exploring the physicality, vocality and emotional background of a role, but as a performer I also loved the feeling of being certain about what was needed on stage. Now most of the time you end up with directors who are able to strike somewhere in the middle. What was more important, though, was that I realized that in order to keep going in this field I could not cling to any one acting method, but had to work to build a relationship with each director so that the communication between us resulted in realization of the play. This idea also came with the epiphany that attaining honesty on stage should not be hard. I found that when I obsessed too much about any process it hindered my ability to know my character. Process should be the road leading you forward, the flags cuing you in the right direction. I have had parts that I have grappled with, struggled through and felt unable to get my head around. I found that whenever I removed myself from trying to squeeze into a certain process, and instead let the character and the text guide me, it became a case of discovery without the angst. This is not to say that I will never have a hard time again, it is simply a reminder to just relax.

As a good actor I should be able to hit my stride no matter what the acting method. We shall see.